I really fucking hate that M&M analogy. It is so fucking anti-woman it isn’t even funny.
It pushes the fact that women are completely incapable of being able to tell the difference between someone who is dangerous and someone who is not.
It pushes the fact that women cannot think for themselves.
It pushes the idea that women are so weak, they have to be afraid all the time.
Not only that…
It completely ignores the fact that other women can be toxic. Abusive. Can kill.
It erases the years of abuse at the hand of my mother. Erases the years of bullying by other women. It erases the fact that women have been the ones to take advantage of me being a lesbian for their gain out of their own entitlement.
I am tired of being told I am weak and should be scared by a movement that was suppose to be about empowering women, and I am tired of being told the abuse and suffering I went through doesn’t matter and doesn’t exist by the exact same movement.
there are sjws out there that make a great deal of effort of protecting their bigotry and going about saying “when i say i hate straight/cis/white/ people/males i don’t mean i hate all straight people i hate the oppression”
if you don’t mean it don’t fucking say it
you know that that’s not what you’re trying to say and instead of phrasing it to make it so that people don’t get mad at you you just go “oh i didn’t mean this and blah blah blah”
it’s your fucking fault that you said such bullshit in the first place
stop blaming others for your inability to say what you really mean
Fuck it, I’m feeling educational today.
There’s this thing that none of you seem to know about called metonymy and it’s where you use a whole to stand in for a part. To give you an example, metonymy would be when someone says, “Washington is so corrupt these days,” and you understand that they do not mean that every citizen of Washington, D.C., or even every congressperson in Washington, D.C. is completely morally bankrupt, and that they are actually talking about the idea of Washington, D.C. and the structure that is in place being corrupt. When “America” goes to war, every single American does not simultaneously take up arms. When “the internet” attacks someone, every person with an internet connection does not become a hivemind of anger aimed at an individual.
So when I say, “I hate straight people,” I am saying exactly what I mean. “I hate the system of oppression and homophobia that was set up by and benefits straights.” Metonymy. Boom.
But furthermore, it’s not even that I “hate the oppression” (although I do). I also hate those who are complicit, who benefit from a system that I can’t access, and when I demand entry, deny that they had any part of it or received any benefits, and tell me that I should make it the same way they did - without any help.
I do not care whether you get mad at me for saying that. I could not give a flying shit if that upsets you. I will say what I want to say and you will accept it, because as an ally that is your job.When you decided to call yourself an ally, you didn’t just sign up for the rainbow bracelets and the pretty gay marriage .gifs. You signed up to support the queer community and that means supporting queer people in what they say, feel and believe. Don’t blame me because you didn’t read the fine print.
Except, even as a metonymy, you are simplifying oppression and systems by simply saying you hate _____ people. You are expecting people with learning disabilities to figure out what you mean. If you mean you hate the system of oppression, then say that. By saying you hate a group of people, you are telling them that you hate them.
Oppression is far more complicated than just a single grouping of people. By saying you hate a group of people, even if you mean you hate oppression, you are relating the fact that everyone in that group of people cannot ever understand what it means to be oppressed. Straight people can be trans people. Cis people could be non-white. White people can be gay.
This is why this lumping of a group of people, even though you mean something else, is harmful. Oppression is far more complicated than one group of people against another. It’s pitting an “us vs them” mentality- amongst the same groups of people that are suffering from oppression.
When you tell me you hate an aspect of me, even if you mean you hate a system that is causing problems, I cannot trust you to support me when I need support against those same systematic problems.
Not only that, this shit is fairly abelist as fuck. Not everyone can understand what you mean, even if you lay it out to them that “nono no, I mean I hate oppression.” Sorry, but learning disabilities get in the way of that. You need to be literal with people because, guess what, that is how they understand things. Most people have not had the chance to understand what a metonymy is.
And call it all you want, but if people are taking your message to mean that you hate them, then what you actually mean, then the problem is not with them. It is with your message.
And this is not from someone who is an “ally”.
not to mention how cissexist that picture is lmao
-the canadian one
Okay so I’ve been linked this by a good friend, and can I say… How fucking dare you thefrogman?
And this is not just because of your beyond the moon ignorance in that above comment about women experiencing such assault and being afraid continuously. But using personal anecdotes much more than it being systematic. You use YOUR own experiences and some STORIES you’ve heard from friends and equate that to the systematic assault of women.
Your response is atrocious because you’re telling a male victim the same thing I was basically told when I got harassed. “Maybe if you did that you could have avoided that whole situation”.
How dare you tell a victim of violence and assault those words and compare them to a woman’s situation where she was not even touched. You do not sit here and tell a victim their assault could have been easily avoided, and that they probably wont have it happen to them a next time they’re on the streets.
It’s not like men are over 40% of domestic abuse victims, which raises the question about how many men are actually also assault victims, and how many are rape victims but are ignored by skewed statistics and exclusionary stats that do not count rape by envelopment as rape because “lols he’s hard he so wants it” (Which, by the way, is the same thing as saying a girl wants it because her nips are hard and her pussy’s wet).
Views of abuse is much more widely accepted when a women beats and shoves a man, because it’s amusing how the man is emasculated and how the women is “Taking power”. Abuse towards men and assault towards them is comical because if he does anything, he’ll be seen as the abuser.
So continue being the douchebag you are, frogman. Because the only thing you’re proving to us is how much of a male saviour you continue to be. How you think you’re doing us a favour by including women into your blog but showing yourself to be extremely ignorant in your 32 years of living.
(P.S. nice job deleting the original comments above, too bad people captured it quick enough to call out your shit.)
This post gave me a stroke.
Girls grew up what? Cause I’ve always just said ‘I don’t give out my phone number to people I don’t know’ and just like that, the situation is over.
Why y’all so paranoid?
I’ve had to give fake numbers to both men and women who wouldn’t get a fucking message. I’m a gay male.
the not all m and ms sentiment is no different to the people who claim that letting a gay man work as an elementary school teacher or letting a Muslim on a plane is playing Russian Roulette. Knock it the fuck off you neurotic crybabies.
Elliot Rodger is the product of a society that teaches that women are evil and men are entitled (via azspot)
A boy sprawled next to me on the bus, elbows out, knee pointing sharp into my thigh.
He frowned at me when I uncrossed my legs, unfolded my hands
and splayed out like boys are taught to: all big, loose limbs.
I made sure to jab him in the side with my pretty little sharp purse.
At first he opened his mouth like I expected him to, but instead of speaking up he sat there, quiet, and took it for the whole bus ride.
Like a girl.
Once, a boy said my anger was cute, and he laughed,
and I remember thinking that I should sit there and take it,
because it isn’t ladylike to cause a scene and girls aren’t supposed to raise their voices.
But then he laughed again and all I saw
was my pretty little sharp nails digging into his cheek
before drawing back and making a horribly unladylike fist.
(my teacher informed me later that there is no ladylike way of making a fist.)
When we were both in the principal’s office twenty minutes later
him with a bloody mouth and cheek, me with skinned knuckles,
I tried to explain in words that I didn’t have yet
that I was tired of having my emotions not taken seriously
just because I’m a girl.
Girls are taught: be small, so boys can be big.
Don’t take up any more space than absolutely necessary.
Be small and smooth with soft edges
and hold in the howling when they touch you and it hurts:
the sandpaper scrape of their body hair that we would be shamed for having,
the greedy hands that press too hard and too often take without asking permission.
Girls are taught: be quiet and unimposing and oh so small
when they heckle you with their big voices from the window of a car,
because it’s rude to scream curse words back at them, and they’d just laugh anyway.
We’re taught to pin on smiles for the boys who jeer at us on the street
who see us as convenient bodies instead of people.
Girls are taught: hush, be hairless and small and soft,
so we sit there and take it and hold in the howling,
pretend to be obedient lapdogs instead of the wolves we are.
We pin pretty little sharp smiles on our faces instead of opening our mouths,
because if we do we get accused of silly women emotions
blowing everything out of proportion with our PMS, we get
condescending pet names and not-so-discreet eyerolls.
Once, I got told I punched like a girl.
I told him, Good. I hope my pretty little sharp rings leave scars.
'My Perfume Doubles As Mace,' theappleppielifestyle. (via albinwonderland)
Honestly, you just showed you were a little violent shit when you were younger for some asinine comment that you could have shot back at with instead of harming him.
By the “not all men” logic, Russian Roulette is a perfectly safe game to play. Sure, one of the chambers has a bullet in it…
but not all chambers
People use the same logic to defend against not letting islamic people on planes, not letting gay people babysit children or work as teachers, and not submitting black people to constant stop and searches
Uh. Did I say that? No.
I’m angry that society isn’t honoring the deaths equally. Tumblr complains how the media only cares when white women die. But when it comes to the shooting, they’re doing the exact same thing. What happened to those women was awful and it they died from misogyny. The the men were killed out of misandry and racism. They were all killed because of a humanity hater with a God complex.